Channeling(and then strangling) the Martha gene

I was reading a great blog entry by a talented fellow blogger the other day. It was by Marty from textiles in time. It's only from the other day and about being a creative woman who also has a house to keep and family to care for. Go ahead and read it...I'll wait, lalalalalalalallalalalalllfalalalala back? O.k. that's a smart lady with a great attitude and I want some for Christmas. However, I can't seem to let go of the urge to so the Martha-thing. Now mind you, it's not because I have a demanding husband and child. In fact, they're very much like the experience that she describes in her writing-if I only asked, they would do so many of the things I hate to do without complaint. They love to see me happy and being creative. So I'm putting on my shrink cap and examining my own head. Why do I fight asking? Why do I wait until things are at a dramatic point and I'm totally not enjoying the time of year or being creative? I think it must be some genetic thing. Martha is eastern European descent and I was born in Germany. It must be something bred into the genes. I say this because I know several people who are the same way. They can't, or won't delegate. Somewhere in my messy past someone told me that I wasn't a good woman if I didn't have a sparkling home and further-that I should be ashamed for not making it so. For heavens sake-I'm very close to 60-when does one develope the ability to let go of the Martha gene? It really takes a lot of the fun out of many things including holidays. I don't usually make New Years resolutions because I get depressed when I don't keep them but I'm making an exception this year-This year, I will find a way to strangle the inner Martha.

Having said all of that and asked myself all of these questions I must now say that I'm late posting today because I painted my front door a beautiful intense barn red. I am so happy with the color I could plotz. The bad part is that it's oil based paint and will not dry till March and I have people in and out of this door all the time. Gad, My son got annoyed with me for putting Wet Paint signs up all over but I think he'll be a lunatic when he ruins his good clothes. Why didn't I do this in July? The sun hits that door all day-it would have dried in a day.

Also, I went up in the attic(shudderrr) and got some of the literally thousands of decorations down. I have a number of Christmas quilts. All wall-hanging size and masses of things like you see above. Every year I say I'm going to weed out the stuff-and then the day after New Years I am so sick of everything and in no mood to look at it-sooo I shove it in boxes and say something like "I'll sort out this crap later" HA! Another year passes...... There is some really awful weather predicted for the next day or so and in anticipation of this I went to Blockbuster and rented the only two things that interested me. A study in contrasts here- The DaVinci Code, and The Libertine with Johnny Depp. I ma curious about the DaVinci thing and Mr. Depp can just stand there and look rakish anytime for me. He doesn't have to do a thing except cast that devilish eye around. sigh..... Funny that I should find him attractive because most of the time he really looks like he could use a good washing and I'm very fussy about personal hygiene. Must be the BAD BOY thing. Also not normal for me. Maybe I can get rid of it the same time I get rid of the Martha Gene. See ya later.